From Pregnancy to Parenthood: Perspectives from Edmonton Moms
For many Edmonton moms, the birth of a child is a magical, unforgettable moment. Yet, for some, it can also be an emotional roller coaster. The journey from pregnancy to parenthood for mothers has no right or wrong way to feel. It’s simply a time when everyone’s feelings are valid. There is no doubt that once you welcome home a baby, nothing is ever the same again. Yes, it is exciting and joyful, but it can also be completely overwhelming. I had the pleasure of connecting with a few local moms who generously shared their stories and perspectives, offering a heartfelt glimpse into their journey from pregnancy to parenthood.
On Support Systems – Motherhood: A Beautiful Chaos
At 28, first-time mom Kimberely enjoyed her pregnancy and anticipated a similar joy in motherhood. “I imagined it would be effortless, that I’d immediately bond with my baby, and that my maternal instincts would just take over,” explains Kimberely, who resides in Ward Nakota Isga (Central West Edmonton) with her husband and six-month-old daughter. However, she faced a reality of conflicting feelings and an evolving sense of self as she endeavored to adjust to her new role. “Being a mom is tough,” she confesses, recognizing a truth that is often unspoken.
For Kimberly, like many mothers in Edmonton, supports systems are the backbone of their journey and there is no rule book on what that support system should look like. With her immediate family living in New Brunswick, Kimberely had to find local support. “The Edmonton Moms Facebook group became my lifeline,” she laughed. “I could ask anything, from which prenatal vitamins to take to which stroller is the best. The advice and support I received were incredible.” She was fortunate to also connect with second time mothers and the OGs from the group, drawing comfort and wisdom in their stories and advice.
Adetoun, a resident of Ward O-day’min (Central Edmonton) and a mother of two, highlighted the significance of prenatal courses provided by Alberta Health Services “The classes were fantastic. Not only did they prepare us for childbirth, but we also made friends who were going through the same experiences,” she explained. “Imagine, we still meet up for playdates with our toddlers.” The bonds formed in these classes often extend well beyond the birth of their babies, creating a network of support that lasts for years. Yet she believes that awareness about these prenatal classes needs to increase especially among immigrant mothers. Motherhood can feel very isolating, so it’s crucial to identify the people who will show up for you Adetoun says.
On Health & Wellness – Motherhood: The Metamorphosis of My Body
Maintaining health and wellness throughout pregnancy and beyond is a primary concern for Edmonton mothers. However, the transition to motherhood signifies a profound shift that affects every aspect of one’s physical and psychological self. This transformation is known as matrescence, a term coined by medical anthropologist Dana Raphael in the 1970s. In her writings, she highlights that in some cultures we say, ‘a woman has given birth,’ while here we say, ‘a child is born,'” says Aurélie Athan, a reproductive psychologist at Columbia University. “This shift places the emphasis on the child rather than the mother, often overlooking the mother’s own transformation.”
For Sarah, prenatal yoga classes and an active membership at the Millwoods Community Recreation Centre was her way to stay active, manage stress, and nearly regain her pre-pregnancy body. “Exercising was a way to reclaim that relationship with my body while releasing mood-boosting endorphins,” she says. “It also models for your child that self-care is important, showing them that you are worth taking care of.”
Not every mother has the same flexibility, though. Jada, a 35-year-old mother of two and resident of Ward Sipiwiyiniwak (West Edmonton), finds it challenging to stay active. “I miss my pre-pregnancy body. I’ve planned many times to go to the gym, but the membership is expensive, and with my husband working out of town, it’s hard to find time for home exercises.”
Studies show that women need six to nine months to fully recover from labor and delivery, not just the arbitrary six-week checkup with an obstetrician or midwife. Adjusting to your postpartum self can take time. Some women might feel like their bodies no longer belong to them or that they always have a baby attached to them, making it harder to get those physical movements in. “Think of self-care as refueling your tank,” Sarah adds. “It’s essential to keep yourself energized so you can be the bring your awesome self to parenthood.”
On Pain points – Motherhood: Championing Your Own Needs
“Joining the New Moms WhatsApp group was a real eye-opener for me as it stressed the importance of self-advocacy during medical appointments”. Ngozi, who is also a new mom and a recent immigrant, shared that her interactions with the group made her realize the importance of explicitly communicating with her doctors and nurses about the specific kind of care and support she required. In the diverse cultural landscape of Canada, not everyone comes from the same healthcare background, and it’s crucial to have personalized care – something Ngozi notes might require reminding the city’s healthcare team about.
While it may not be self-advocacy for some, pain points such as sleep deprivation, breastfeeding challenges, and the delicate balance of work and motherhood were common experiences for these Edmonton moms. Sarah recalls her struggle with breastfeeding; “I thought it would come naturally, but it was hard,” she said. “I had issues with latching, and it was painful. Thankfully, I found a lactation consultant at Misericordia Community Hospital who helped us figure it out.”
On Triumphs – Motherhood: The Complex Joy it brings
Amidst the challenges, countless moments of triumph make the journey worthwhile. Jada recounted the joy of her first child’s birth. “It was the most magical moment of my life,” she said. “All the pain and exhaustion disappeared when I held him for the first time.”
Sarah celebrated the community she built through her attendance at the Millwoods Community Recreation Centre. “Seeing other moms come together, support each other, and build friendships has been amazing,” she said. “It’s more than just a gathering; it’s a family.”
The general sentiment from these Edmonton moms is that the journey from pregnancy to parenthood is unique and can be particularly difficult with round-the-clock infant care especially in the first year. Yet, with a strong community, a focus on health and wellness, and a resilient spirit, the challenges of motherhood can be met with grace and triumph. The little wins and milestones, such as when they take their first step or say their first word, all culminate in a beautiful surge of emotions.
As Kimberely put it so beautifully, “Motherhood is the hardest, yet most rewarding job I’ve ever had. And having the support of fellow moms makes all the difference.” Whether you’re a new mom, a seasoned parent, or somewhere in between, these insights from Edmonton moms offer a relatable and heartfelt glimpse into the beautiful journey of raising children in Amiskwacîwâskahikan (Edmonton).
The author wishes to thank Kimberely, Adetoun, Sarah, Jada and Ngozi for generously sharing their stories and insights, enriching this article with their diverse experiences of pregnancy and motherhood in Edmonton.
Stella Igweamaka holds an MBA from the University of Lagos in Nigeria and is proud to call Amiskwacîwâskahikan (Edmonton) her home. She is passionate about using research and storytelling for impactful change and was recently featured on CBC News for her work with Black Canadian Women in Action on the adultification of Black girls in Canada. You can find more of her work on www.stellaigweamaka.com