The speed at which I choose to ride my motorcycle on the highway leaves me with a sense of freedom and a sense of being in control of my life and the situation at hand.
My focus is on the road and my surroundings. It’s exhilarating.
The temptations I face at a buffet table filled with delectable desserts is quite the opposite, however. I have little control over the rationale to pick and choose in moderation, letting my obsession with something sweet and savory take over. The regret that follows sometimes overshadows the lingering taste in my mouth (or the loosened buttons on my clothing that make it more comfortable to breathe).
The feeling of no control holds so many connotations – for those struggling with mental health and addictions, for those in jobs where they feel hindered or overshadowed by rules and regulations or less than empowering and supportive employers, or for others that are so confident, bold, or brazen that they simply don’t care or are well aware of the consequences to their actions and do it anyways.
It has been said that you don’t become successful by playing it safe. It’s also been said that playing it safe kills your creativity, leaving you feeling complacent and less motivated to explore new possibilities or challenge your potential in all aspects of your life. Taking risks, making mistakes, learning to problem-solve and thinking strategically outside your comfort zone are all part of growing up and learning how to thrive and survive in your day-to-day surroundings.
So, let’s explore some examples.
For students moving away from home for the first time, no controls might mean no more curfews, no regimented chores (like keeping your room clean or cleaning the bathroom), it may mean testing your alcohol tolerance, or living on fast food for more than what might seem an acceptable or a healthy regime.
For others, it might mean listening to music, full blast, in your car or home and singing at the top of your lungs when no one else is around to hear or criticize your less than pitch-perfect rendition of those Top 10 hits.
And for others still, it may just mean taking a break from a long-standing relationship, if only for a moment. A break to remind yourself that even when you’re in a committed relationship, the importance of being yourself and owning your own identity is still of great importance.
Relationships take work, communication, and compromise, but sometimes, they also need space, adversity, and independence. In letting go, you sometimes realize you want to hold on tighter. No controls remind us of the sense of satisfaction that comes when we do have and take control… and there’s nothing wrong with letting go and having no controls – if only for a moment. The choice is yours. Embrace it.
Jacqueline Biollo is a strategic optimist who definitely embraces the power of no control every once in a while. Whether it’s by being her authentic self, respectful of others and her surroundings, but choosing to push the envelope, walk the line, or test the waters whenever the opportunity presents itself. Jacqueline sees value in living life to the fullest and uses life experiences to enhance the possibilities and potential in her personal and professional life.
Photo by Coral Konanz Photography | HMUA by Krysta Jayne